Be my toilet paper! 1
Be my toilet paper! 2
Be my toilet paper! 3
Be my toilet paper! 4

Why should I use the good toilet paper when I have you! YOU are cheap and good to use for something like that!
I tie you in the bathroom and there you can stay! 
Whenever I need you, I wipe myself on you. You're just a rag for me, nothing more! 
And so I save water and toilet paper, you are cheaper! YOU rag!